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Post #1
Your name is LEE HWAN-JI.
You live in your SHITTY ONE-ROOM SHACK on the countryside of the DEMOCRATIC PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF BEST KOREA
You are HUNGRY.
What do you do?
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STEAL DRUGS AND SELL IT THEN GET EXECUTED BY PO-PO.
/thread
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>Stop SPEAKING like THIS.
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Okay?
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He's pointing out that in the OP, items of interest are written in all caps, like in text adventures.
Either way, start making some actual suggestions. Also, you can only control the main character.
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ok, ok, ok. I have to ask now. What the hell is the OP?
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Google is your friend.
OP=Original Post or Original Poster.
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> Hide that fucking bucket. What happens if your glorious friendleader happens by and sees your shameful excrement bucket out in the open, waiting for him to step in it?
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You quickly hide the BUCKET OF EXCREMENT from plain view.
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wonder why you are bigger than your shack
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It's North Korea after all.
A BITCH approaches from the west.
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>Walk to the right
Edited:
That's West.It's North Korea after all.
A BITCH approaches from the east.
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Yes, fixed it.
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>Kill bitch with bucket. Eat it
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> Empty bucket on bitch, eat it.
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>Hoist the flag of the Republic of Korea over your house.
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smack bitch around and demand she give you your money
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You contemplate using the BUCKET to kill the BITCH, but you don't really want feces in the food.
You kick it instead.
You devour the BITCH completely, leaving only blood. Your HUNGER is restored.
(It's 3 AM here. I have to get some sleep now.)
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You hoist the flag of the REPUBLIC OF WORST KOREA on the top of your SHACK.
KIM JONG-IL DISAPPROVES OF YOUR ACTIONS
You lose one KIM-POINT (KP).
If you do something that goes against the regime, like speaking against the government or siding with South Korea, you will lose kim-points. If you do something that the regime approves of, you will gain kim-points.
If you get 20 KP, you will be granted a job within the Worker's Party of Korea and you will be allowed to live in Pyongyang. If you have -10 KP, you will get arrested.
You currently have -1 KP. Your KP status can be checked at any time by typing /kp.
There are other commands like this. Here's a list of them:
/inventory
/health
/hunger
/energy
/bladder
The latter commands are your NEEDS. If a need is below 30%, the game will automatically alert you about it.
Your current needs:
Health: 65%
Hunger: 100%
Energy: 40%
Bladder: 55%
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hail KIM JONG-IL with all your might, and praise him as the hero of the world and the best guy ever
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You shout some FINE WORDS ABOUT KIM JONG-IL into the air.
KIM JONG-IL APPROVES OF YOUR ACTIONS
You gain 1 KP.
Keep in mind that this will only work once. You can only gain or lose 1 KP from an action, so praising Kim Jong-il again will not earn you additional KP. Reversing a negative action will not regain the lost KP either, so if you remove the flag, you will not get any KP.
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Screw being good, lets get arrested
Burn the Best Korea flag
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raise the best korea flag higher, burn the other one, we can be bad when we get into the government ;D
that way we can screw over more people before we get arrested
think about it, get arrested as a no name bum, or get into the goverment and get arrested for broadcasing your bum over the emergency broadcast network onto every tv in korea, im going for the goverment one
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thought so. um, do we have a job?
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You use the extra flag pole to raise the BEST KOREA FLAG. You throw the WORST KOREA FLAG on the ground where it belongs.
You rub the flag with feces and light it with a stick.
KIM JONG-IL APPROVES OF YOUR ACTIONS
You gain 1 KP.
Edited:
Nope.
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dance around the burning flag
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Piss the fire out and sing the NK anthem
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Your BLADDER is over 50%. Therefore, you cannot urinate.
However, you sing the North Korean anthem.
KIM JONG-IL APPROVES OF YOUR ACTIONS
You gain 1 KP.
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go to the friendly neigborhood workhouse and get a job.
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What workhouse?
You live right next to the highway. There aren't any people living nearby.
Besides, you only have 2 kim-points. You need at least 10 to start studying, let alone working.
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Start to make a dirt barrier on the road and make people pay to pass by.
Donate 30% of your earnings to Best Korea.
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Reshape those Damn hills so you can make The Fortress XL2.2.3
Edited:
Them Koreans got Magical powers.
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Eat shit in the honor of KIM JONG-IL .
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You use your STICK to make a DIRT BARRIER on the road.
You wait patiently for a car...
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Check if you can see buildings somewhere up ahead.
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Enter the shack, draw a picture of Kim-Jong-Il kicking every world leader's ass.
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Get Kim-Jong-Il tattoo on your chest
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No.
Get him tattoo on your penis.
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stick twigs in your dickhole
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OH HoHo.
Edited:
Because then it would fly away.
Winner x 10
Funny x 5
Dumb x 6
Agree x 7
Disagree x 1
Zing x 6
Informative x 1
Friendly x 2
Artistic x 5
