[elitehakor v2]

My guess is on shits and giggles

[Neat!]

I got an idea for an SCP

A knife so dull it heals people when you stab them.

[esalaka]

That doesn't have shit to do with dullness.

A blade that negates cutting wounds sounds interesting but not really SCP-worthy IMHO. I guess you could write it.

[Aperture fan]

Neat! posted:

I got an idea for an SCP

A knife so dull it heals people when you stab them.

Sounds more like an idea for that list of odd but otherwise unexceptional items. Lemme find a link to it real quick so you know what I mean.

Edited:

Here is it

http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/log-of-anomalous-items

[Deiru]

rinoaff33 posted:

I always wonder how the Foundation manages to get enough d-class for everything. They seem to kill at least 100 a week just for the lulz. There aren't that many death row convicts...or do they pull them from across the world, not just the US?

in times of duress, Protocol 12 can be authorized, allowing recruitment of innocents or persons incarcerated for lesser crimes.

And let's face it, there's plenty of those.

[esalaka]

"Recruitment of innocents" obviously meaning they just abduct random people to be killed.

[Sobotnik]

Has anybody done an SCP with this idea:

A small slot on a carved stone cube aprox 5x5x5 cm. A stack of post it notes are attached to the side.

You take a sheet of paper off and write down the name of any object you may want made out of iron.
Insert into the slot, and a hologram appears above it of the object specified.
A small cuboid hologram begins to grow outwards from the cube, at about 0.1 m/s.
Every iron atom within this hologram vanishes from existence, and re-appears at the object hologram.
This cuboid sphere keeps expanding until it has all the iron atoms needed for the object. Said object will be 100% pure iron with no impurities.

I thought this up because if somebody pressed this without some nearby iron, all the iron in their blood would be removed. (Leading to problems for aforementioned person) One thing it would do is reduce steel down to a dust composed of the other materials present in steel for example.

Thoughts?

[Deiru]

Sobotnik posted:

Has anybody done an SCP with this idea:

A small slot on a carved stone cube aprox 5x5x5 cm. A stack of post it notes are attached to the side.

You take a sheet of paper off and write down the name of any object you may want made out of iron.
Insert into the slot, and a hologram appears above it of the object specified.
A small cuboid hologram begins to grow outwards from the cube, at about 0.1 m/s.
Every iron atom within this hologram vanishes from existence, and re-appears at the object hologram.
This cuboid sphere keeps expanding until it has all the iron atoms needed for the object. Said object will be 100% pure iron with no impurities.

I thought this up because if somebody pressed this without some nearby iron, all the iron in their blood would be removed. (Leading to problems for aforementioned person) One thing it would do is reduce steel down to a dust composed of the other materials present in steel for example.

Thoughts?

Cuboid Sphere?

Also, it sounds quite similar to SCP-294 to me.

Edited:

Oh, I just finished reading Incident 239-B Clef-Kondraki. I didn't expect to like it that much, but a friend told me it'd be good...

[asteroidrules]

PeonMVC posted:

http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-202

[DATA EXPUNGED]

Commander [EXPUNGED] specifically ordered nobody ever speak of that again and that all data regarding the subject be expunged.

[froztshock]

Addendum: To the anonymous employee who took the Site-17 surveillance camera footage of Drs. Clef and Kondraki having a swordfight, set it to the "Highlander" theme song, and posted it to the company intraweb with the title, "There Can Be Only One": We will find out who you are, and when we do, you'll be missed greatly.

[Katatonic717]

Sobotnik posted:

Has anybody done an SCP with this idea:
A small slot on a carved stone cube aprox 5x5x5 cm. A stack of post it notes are attached to the side.

If I had a nickel for the number of people who have made, or want to make cube shaped SCPs...

[Neat!]

Neat! posted:

I got an idea for an SCP

A knife so dull it heals people when you stab them.

it was a fucking joke, people

[rinoaff33]

Katatonic717 posted:

If I had a nickel for the number of people who have made, or want to make cube shaped SCPs...

Make it a DnD d20 die. And I don't just mean an icosahedron, I literally mean the die used in DnD.

[SurferSasquatch]

Neat! posted:

it was a fucking joke, people

Joke's on them I was only pretending

[megafat]

Can SCP-173 be this on April Fool's? (Starting from 17 seconds in?)

[Spycrabz]

rinoaff33 posted:

I always wonder how the Foundation manages to get enough d-class for everything. They seem to kill at least 100 a week just for the lulz. There aren't that many death row convicts...or do they pull them from across the world, not just the US?

Remember, the site is styled like the actual intranet portal for a real life SCP Foundation would be. They say they're death row prisoners, but they could just as easily be political dissidents from North Korea. The same goes for monthly termination, they might just say that to quell any moral issues the research staff might have.

[TRLEChippers]

Another one of these crappy SCPs. This particular one has 31 downvotes

[C:\]

Oh wow, I could shit out a better SCP.
That one is 1 billion light years away, yet 100 trillion times the size of the milky way?

[mankind_me]

C:\ posted:

Oh wow, I could shit out a better SCP.
That one is 1 billion light years away, yet 100 trillion times the size of the milky way?

pick the highest numbers you can think of; stick them in an scp

[Tagger]

Protocol 12 makes me believe the Foundation supports thr War on Drugs.

[milkandcooki]

http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-887

887 is pretty cool.

[Riller]

231 haunts me just a little still. Possibly because brutal, long-term systematic kiddie-rape is such a fuckin' common problem in my end of the world. That SCP reminded me of newspaper articles that pop up about once a month.

[Lordgeorge16]

I think a new event should be added to SCP-895's camera feed. At one random instant, once a day, the image goes dark, and when it re-brightens, the coffin lid should be on the ground, exposing whatever is inside it for a split second before the camera feed "crashes" in a BSOD manner for 10 minutes.

[Riller]

Lordgeorge16 posted:

I think a new event should be added to SCP-895's camera feed. At one random instant, once a day, the image goes dark, and when it re-brightens, the coffin lid should be on the ground, exposing whatever is inside it for a split second before the camera feed "crashes" in a BSOD manner for 10 minutes.

Well, given that the coffin is empty to anything but cameras, the scariness of it opening is quite watered down.

[Lordgeorge16]

Riller posted:

Well, given that the coffin is empty to anything but cameras, the scariness of it opening is quite watered down.

But we're viewing it through a faux camera feed, which means that there should be something so horrid inside that the feed "crashes" almost as soon as it comes on-screen.

[Riller]

Disregard that, I'm an idiot. The opening, however, would require you to die, so... Kind of a downer to me, at least.

[Lordgeorge16]

Riller posted:

Disregard that, I'm an idiot. The opening, however, would require you to die, so... Kind of a downer to me, at least.

Not necessarily. I'm just guessing that either A: the camera is designed to shut down if the lid is removed from the coffin, or B: whatever is inside is so mind-fucking-ly scary that the camera malfunctions and breaks when it is seen, which would protect, so to speak, the viewer from psychological insanity upon viewing it.

[Cone]

Lordgeorge16 posted:

Not necessarily. I'm just guessing that either A: the camera is designed to shut down if the lid is removed from the coffin, or B: whatever is inside is so mind-fucking-ly scary that the camera malfunctions and breaks when it is seen, which would protect, so to speak, the viewer from psychological insanity upon viewing it.

Apparently whatever the camera placed inside it was scary enough to make a hardened command unit scream himself possibly to death, so I doubt anybody seeing it would walk away particularly sane.

Besides, it's a lot scarier to imagine what's inside rather than have it shown to you. It's the principle the scariest games known to man are based on; not what actually does lurk in the dark, but what could.

[Riller]

Cone posted:

Apparently whatever the camera placed inside it was scary enough to make a hardened command unit scream himself possibly to death, so I doubt anybody seeing it would walk away particularly sane.

Besides, it's a lot scarier to imagine what's inside rather than have it shown to you. It's the principle the scariest games known to man are based on; not what actually does lurk in the dark, but what could.

I think it's more like something attacked him through the monitor, or telephathically killed the shit out of him.

[Ghhostface]

A new batch just came up:
http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1077
SCP-1077 "The Unobservable Entity"
http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1507
SCP-1507 "Pink Flamingos"
http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1730
SCP-1730 "The Rat Colony"

[esalaka]

Don't we already have an unobservable entity?

[Ghhostface]

esalaka posted:

Don't we already have an unobservable entity?

We do, and thats probably why its standing at -4- -6- -7- its been self-deleted by the author.

[Val67]

Too much [REDACTED] kills the [REDACTED]

[Articsledder]

Ghhostface posted:

http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1507
SCP-1507 "Pink Flamingos"

We have one of those flamingos in our garden. I just noticed it looks directly into my computer room window

[Riller]

Val67 posted:

Too much [REDACTED] kills the [REDACTED]

[REDACTED] █████████ ████ ██████████████████ [REDACTED] ██-██-████ [DATA EXPUNGED]

[rinoaff33]

Riller posted:

[REDACTED] █████████ ████ ██████████████████ [REDACTED] ██-██-████ [DATA EXPUNGED]

Looks like SCP-1459-J fell on your post.

[Aperture fan]

milkandcooki posted:

http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-887

887 is pretty cool.

Sample 887-3877: Eight pages, German. A folkloric tale of a boy born without a heart, who ventures into the woods and acquires one from a friendly old woman. He grows up and marries a beautiful lady, who dies giving birth to a demon that devours both.

Such a touching story. Gets me every time.

Edited:

oh god 887's logs are gold

Sample 887-3137: 47 pages of Hexadecimal code. Code successfully compiles into a PNG image of Dr. ████████ in a speedo. Dr. ████████ claims no such picture was taken.

Sample 887-1111: The musical score for "SCP Foundation, The Musical"

Personally, I think we should try to sell this to Broadway. I mean, really; how else are you going to see Dr. Bright and Dr. Clef belting out a duet about SCP-682's eating habits? -Dr. Edison

[Aperture fan]

You guys remember that vending machine that sold anything? And how one of the things it dispensed was "Tentacle Grape?"

it's real

[Untitled01]

I'm a little new to all this - I only got into SCP from a game. I forgot it's name, but you all probably know about it.

I'm unsure where exactly to start on all this. But basically, these stories are creepy stories about various types of organisms? I've found the wiki where they're all archived, but I'm not entirely sure what to do. Just start reading?

Yeah okay, I'm a "newfag" or whatever the word is that cool kids use these days.

[Zombii]

Untitled01 posted:

I'm a little new to all this - I only got into SCP from a game. I forgot it's name, but you all probably know about it.

I'm unsure where exactly to start on all this. But basically, these stories are creepy stories about various types of organisms? I've found the wiki where they're all archived, but I'm not entirely sure what to do. Just start reading?

Yeah okay, I'm a "newfag" or whatever the word is that cool kids use these days.

Just go to the main list and start picking ones out at random. Alternatively, you can wait around and I'm sure some people would give you some good ones.
Personally, I recommend 455 and The Sculptor of SoHo.