1. Post #81
    Mr.Dugong's Avatar
    November 2010
    463 Posts
    http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-705 i wonder what happens if you give it a metric fuck load of play doh



    hey what do you think would happen if 705 met http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-387
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  2. Post #82
    http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-705 i wonder what happens if you give it a metric fuck load of play doh
    Since it's sentient i'd bet it would evolve into some kinda hyper-advanced playdoh society

    And it would be cute to get four or five colors and watch them fight Age of Empires style
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  3. Post #83
    I HATE COFFEE
    jomt1234's Avatar
    April 2009
    8,343 Posts
    http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-705 i wonder what happens if you give it a metric fuck load of play doh
    66) No using SCP-705 for personal gain.

    66.5) Or to plant monitoring equipment.

    66.7) And absolutely no giving them tons of extra playdough 'just to see what they can make.' That Mecha was damned annoying!

    66.9) No telling them that Dr. Rights' underwear drawer is a 'strategic ambush position'. As a matter of fact, no telling ANYTHING that Dr. Rights' delicates drawer is a strategic ambush position. Nothing in there has any strategic value, Bright.

    66.95) Dr. Bright is not to explain his definition of strategic value, ever again. Anyone found asking will be terminated.
    The Things Dr Bright Is Not Allowed To Do At the Foundation

    108) Dr. Bright is not allowed to upload visual memetic kill agents to 4chan 7chan any imageboard.

    108.1) Well, okay, maybe to 4chan. It'd be doing the gene pool a service.

    I think this was p. clever!
    76) Dr. Bright is not allowed to go to fan conventions.

    76.5) Let alone use them as recruitment drives.

    76.9) Especially not at Furry Conventions.
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  4. Post #84
    Gold Member
    Joazzz's Avatar
    June 2008
    24,184 Posts
    SCP-354-18: Metallic humanoid machine described by several D-class personnel as a "Terminator." Subject posessed a cloaking device rendering it invisible to human eyes. Subject was highly adept at combat and killed nearly 90% of Area-354's guard personnel as it rampaged through the facility. Approximately sixty (60) minutes after emerging from the pool, subject ceased function and powered down. Subject's was dismantled and its power cell was disposed of. Subject's remains are under study.
    I now officially love the Red Pool.
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  5. Post #85
    Secure, Contain, Protect.
    Zombii's Avatar
    October 2008
    7,972 Posts
    115 is the best
    That dumptruck is hilarious
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  6. Post #86
    Gold Member
    finbe's Avatar
    June 2010
    2,234 Posts
    SCP-407 Is my favorite one.
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  7. Post #87
    Secure, Contain, Protect.
    Zombii's Avatar
    October 2008
    7,972 Posts
    To the pageking of page 2.

    FUCK YOU
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  8. Post #88
    TalonAran's Avatar
    February 2009
    1,617 Posts
    Item #: SCP-173

    Object class: Euclid

    Special Containment Procedures: SCP-173 is to be kept in shed behind farm. Three strong communist men must drink liter of vodka before enter. Two must stare at item, one must continue drink vodka.

    Description: Moved to shed after wooden pen freeze and break during cold Soviet winter. Shed is also wood, but with paint sometimes. SCP-173 is extremely hostile, like red faced Americans. Is also coward. Neither will make move while strong Soviet men have watchful eye. No one blink, on punishment of beating with cold leather. Object enjoy snap neck, like American commando pig. If object allowed to move, all will be sent to cold Siberia for reeducation.

    Personnel report sound of stone scraping when creature is alone. This is dutiful Russian work ethic. If sound stops, subject to be beaten with iron rods, like child.

    Floor is covered in shit and blood, like normal Soviet household. Shed must be cleaned every two weeks. Kept much cleaner than most Soviet household.
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  9. Post #89
    Gold Member
    Pennywise's Avatar
    July 2005
    2,811 Posts
    To the pageking of page 2.

    FUCK YOU
    Well, at least it wasn't something like 106.

    Edited:
    Just read 583, which was pretty entertaining despite being so short. The attached document was actually kind of funnjesus why is my throat so sore now
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  10. Post #90
    willer's Avatar
    May 2007
    630 Posts
    SCP-682
    The best one for me.


    I love how it has reacted with all the other tests, SCPs, and experiments put on it.
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  11. Post #91
    Gold Member
    Joazzz's Avatar
    June 2008
    24,184 Posts
    From SCP-1049-J:
    Test Author: Dr. Welter
    Object: D-83394, a 35-year-old Caucasian male, temporarily promoted to Provisional Overseer O5-99 for experimental purposes.
    Result: P-O5-99 ages visibly by an estimated fifty years, gaining a markedly gaunt appearance and hunched stature. Eyes appear sunken. Ordinary Class D garb changes form and colour, becoming a hooded black cape. P-O5-99 immediately calls for security personnel: when none are forthcoming, he attempts to attack research personnel with invisible projections from his fingers. When no effect occurs, P-O5-99 withdraws into the corner of the room, uttering ominous threats regarding humanity's future and promising the execution of all present. Subject demoted and tentatively returned to duties.
    Notes: Jeez, I hope this means nothing bad. -O5-██
    Sure, having a galactic sith lord emperor, especially Palpatine, in your secret science research military bunker is always handy.

    Edited:

    Oh, and THIS is SCP in a nutshell:

    http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-014-j
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  12. Post #92
    I am a moderator.
    Swebonny's Avatar
    August 2006
    13,081 Posts
    I loved that page. Thanks for bringing it up again.
    I remember a machine that would receive something and then give back something completely different depending on the setting. Like inserting a bag of beans on some setting would give back a bag of corn, and on another setting it would give back a bag of extraterrestrial seeds that turn everything to ice . . . Yeah you get the point.
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  13. Post #93
    TalonAran's Avatar
    February 2009
    1,617 Posts
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  14. Post #94
    PIRATE METAL BASTARD
    Zenpod's Avatar
    October 2009
    7,521 Posts
    the critical tomatoes is a fucking great one

    Item: One mature SCP-504 tomato
    Subject: A portable computer playing a pre-recorded engineering joke.
    Transcript: "2009 is going to be a complex year. We already know the real part; we still have to find the imaginary part".
    Result: Supersonic blast detected; computer was completely vaporized by the tomato's kinetic energy. Sensor readings indicate an approximate speed of 3500 km/h (2174 mph).
    Item: One mature SCP-504 tomato
    Subject: A portable computer playing a partial audio recording of the Monty Python sketch "The Funniest Joke in the World".
    Transcript: "Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!"
    Result: Tomato explodes. Debris clocked at 137 mph. Computer heavily coated by debris. Keyboard ruined by exposure to liquid matter - all other components proved functional after cleanup.

    MONTY PYTHON
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  15. Post #95
    Gold Member
    finbe's Avatar
    June 2010
    2,234 Posts
    I loved that page. Thanks for bringing it up again.
    I remember a machine that would receive something and then give back something completely different depending on the setting. Like inserting a bag of beans on some setting would give back a bag of corn, and on another setting it would give back a bag of extraterrestrial seeds that turn everything to ice . . . Yeah you get the point.
    Here you go http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-914
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  16. Post #96
    Gold Member
    Lick's Avatar
    April 2010
    2,604 Posts
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  17. Post #97
    Dr. Conro J. Norock, Robot Sarcasm Master
    Conro101's Avatar
    July 2007
    7,714 Posts
    KETER AT ITS FINEST
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  18. Post #98
    Gold Member
    finbe's Avatar
    June 2010
    2,234 Posts
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  19. Post #99
    Gold Member
    Strongbad's Avatar
    December 2008
    4,983 Posts
    Site itself is awesome, community is not. It's really hard to get the 'password' just to register, the chat is full of twats, the admins seem to be really unhelpful, and yes, they do tend to be assholes at time. You're probably better off just lurking unless you REALLY REALLY REALLY have to share your idea with the world.

    Edited:

    Winner reference.
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  20. Post #100
    Moderator
    cosmic duck's Avatar
    September 2007
    2,570 Posts
    Site itself is awesome, community is not. It's really hard to get the 'password' just to register, the chat is full of twats, the admins seem to be really unhelpful, and yes, they do tend to be assholes at time. You're probably better off just lurking unless you REALLY REALLY REALLY have to share your idea with the world.
    Sounds like facepunch.
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  21. Post #101
    Sometimes i fall down :(
    green bandit's Avatar
    July 2008
    3,199 Posts
    I tried making my own a while back, but gave up when i didn't get accepted to their site. here it is if you're interested:
    [[>]]
    [[module Rate]]
    [[/>]]

    [[div style="float:right; margin:0 2em 1em 2em; width:300px; border:0;"]]
    |||| [[image COPY-AND-PASTE-IMAGE-URL-HERE width="300px"]] ||
    ||||~ ^^TEXT-DESCRIBING-THE-PIC^^ ||
    [[/div]]
    **Item #:** SCP-1071

    **Object Class:** Euclid
    **Special Containment Procedures:** SCP-1071 Is to be kept in it's original 20’ by 2’ unmarked cardboard box. SCP-1071 should be kept away from any source of electricity or any electric powered devices, at least a minimum radius of 10’. Personnel authorized for care of SCP-1071 are to be tested for mental stability after handling SCP-1071. Personnel wanting to study SCP-1071 must have the explicit approval of Dr. ███. Staff may only study SCP-1071 in short 25 minute intervals.

    **Description:** SCP-1071 is a plastic black 21” LCD monitor with no logos on the front nor the back of the unit. SCP-1071 has a glossy oval base of what appears to be cheap plastic with a matte black plastic pole protruding from the center that connects to the main screen.
    The main screen does not have any buttons on the front of the unit, the back of the screen is of a matte black finish with three sockets on the lower right. The first socket is a standard 14 Volt connection for a power source. The middle and last connections are standard VGA and HDMI connections. Both of those video connections appear to have been covered with a sort of transparent metal alloy. Tests have been inconclusive of the exact composition of this material.
    Preventing SCP-1071 to be connected to anything except a source of power.

    Upon connecting to SCP-1071 to a standard wall outlet, using an AC power cable, the unit emits a low humming noise. A small light embedded in the plastic in the lower left of the screen turns on. Each time SCP-1071 is connected to power, the light changes a different shade of grey.
    Staff have reported sudden bursts of anger and fear when the light is a dark grey. Lighter shades of grey appear to no effect on staff. The humming noise SCP-1071 emits gets louder and louder the longer staff members are within range. Both Professor ████ and David ████ were reported medically insane after being in the room with SCP-1071 for over 30 minutes. Claiming that the low humming noise was vibrating their skulls and nothing they did could stop it. Even after being separated from SCP-1071.

    The front display of the unit starts showing various moving dots, varying of color, size and speed. roughly 2 to 4 minutes after it has been connected to a power source. Attempts to record what’s being broadcasted on the screen have resulted in the camera or any electrical device to malfunction.
    The random dots appear to be harmless at first, but staff have reported that the dots mold together, and create images that tends to varies between staff. What they all appear to have in common, is that they are all all of affixed with the grey light. When the light is a dark shade of grey, staff have reported videos of their own phobias come alive. It varies from person to person, and no videos are alike. Even if two or more people are staring at the screen at the same time, they all see different things. Lighter shades of grey, tend to show more upbeat videos often centered around kittens and bunnies.
    Anyone that somehow got in, feel free to post this scp-1071
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  22. Post #102
    Angry Pineapple's Avatar
    March 2010
    1,502 Posts
    Pretty weird stuff here.
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  23. Post #103
    Zocom's Avatar
    September 2008
    956 Posts
    I love the exploration logs some of these have. In particular the wardrobe and the ship one.
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  24. Post #104
    Red Toaster's Avatar
    July 2009
    1,331 Posts
    i like the way that the SCP entries kinda tell a story
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  25. Post #105
    Bombardier.'s Avatar
    August 2009
    1,054 Posts
    Something about some of the articles just creeps me right the fuck out. Probably how well-written they are. The images don't help either. Entertaining stuff, but I doubt I'll sleep easy tonight.
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  26. Post #106
    Red Toaster's Avatar
    July 2009
    1,331 Posts
    http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-140

    oh god, this one is creepy as hell

    it implies that history is actually changed by the book expanding which just creeps me the fuck out

    Edited:

    http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-439

    I AM NEVER SLEEPING AGAIN
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  27. Post #107
    fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart fart
    Kinglah Crab's Avatar
    November 2007
    7,814 Posts
    The Things Dr Bright Is Not Allowed To Do At the Foundation

    108) Dr. Bright is not allowed to upload visual memetic kill agents to 4chan 7chan any imageboard.

    108.1) Well, okay, maybe to 4chan. It'd be doing the gene pool a service.
    what's up with dr. bright anyway

    i read something about him getting captured in an amulet which makes people have his personality and memory when exposed to it (or something) but i really don't know
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  28. Post #108
    Cheesedragon's Avatar
    December 2009
    1,586 Posts
    http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-212

    Automatic augmentation machine.
    With this you never know what you're never going to ask for!
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  29. Post #109

    August 2011
    5,969 Posts
    I loved that page. Thanks for bringing it up again.
    I remember a machine that would receive something and then give back something completely different depending on the setting. Like inserting a bag of beans on some setting would give back a bag of corn, and on another setting it would give back a bag of extraterrestrial seeds that turn everything to ice . . . Yeah you get the point.
    That one is my favorite. Especially when you read the logs and realize that they were attempting to insert just about every other SCP into it until they made rules about it.
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  30. Post #110
    Has volunteered for dissection because the doctor is cute
    Tomo Takino's Avatar
    May 2009
    20,216 Posts
    Other favorites of mine include The Living Room, and Pipe Nightmare.

    I love ones where people go into them, and vanish. If they appear later, morphed into a wall or something, it makes it all the better.

    I also like how 682 reacted to 173.
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  31. Post #111
    Gold Member
    ZenX2's Avatar
    February 2009
    5,000 Posts
    How did I just spend another three hours looking at this
    Every time I get close to having read through all the tabs I opened, I find one link, then another two, etc.
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  32. Post #112
    Other favorites of mine include The Living Room, and Pipe Nightmare.

    I love ones where people go into them, and vanish. If they appear later, morphed into a wall or something, it makes it all the better.
    How about the TV show studio, then?
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  33. Post #113
    Mercenary-'s Avatar
    June 2009
    3,288 Posts
    SCP-354-16: Feline-esque creature composed of a dark red-black stone later revealed to be partially solidified magma. Gunfire proved mostly ineffective against its hide. Was not hostile to personnel and did not attempt to escape the walled enclosure until being engaged by SCP-354-15. Successfully terminated SCP-354-15 and grew less active as its body cooled. After fully solidifying and having remained motionless since, subject was moved to Dr. ██████'s office for aesthetic purposes.

    ahaha, oh Red Pool.
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  34. Post #114

    August 2011
    5,969 Posts
    How did I just spend another three hours looking at this
    Every time I get close to having read through all the tabs I opened, I find one link, then another two, etc.
    It's the TVTropes of creepypasta.
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  35. Post #115
    Secure, Contain, Protect.
    Zombii's Avatar
    October 2008
    7,972 Posts
    I remember when me and my friend were at the movies, back when Super 8's teaser was first coming out, we wished it was for an SCP movie.
    That one



    They need to make one.
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  36. Post #116
    Has volunteered for dissection because the doctor is cute
    Tomo Takino's Avatar
    May 2009
    20,216 Posts
    How about the TV show studio, then?
    I know which one youre talking about, but what number is it again?

    I also remember one where it was some kind of deformed guy. The first time I hear about it it reminded me of a Tank in L4D. It escaped, and got into some towns suburbs and started killing people.

    Vague, I know, but I liked it, and cant find it again. Any help would be appreciated.
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  37. Post #117
    Secure, Contain, Protect.
    Zombii's Avatar
    October 2008
    7,972 Posts
    I know which one youre talking about, but what number is it again?

    I also remember one where it was some kind of deformed guy. The first time I hear about it it reminded me of a Tank in L4D. It escaped, and got into some towns suburbs and started killing people.

    Vague, I know, but I liked it, and cant find it again. Any help would be appreciated.
    If it's from a long time ago, it's probably gone. One of their head admins had a tantrum and left, and demanded that they take down some of the best SCPs (that he had written).

    R.I.P. Boolean Sidestepper
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  38. Post #118
    Gold Member

    November 2008
    10,945 Posts
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  39. Post #119
    Secure, Contain, Protect.
    Zombii's Avatar
    October 2008
    7,972 Posts
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  40. Post #120
    Has volunteered for dissection because the doctor is cute
    Tomo Takino's Avatar
    May 2009
    20,216 Posts
    This needs to become SCP-001
    I dunno, its good and all, but its rated so high which means alot of people have seen it.

    Id prefer 001 to be a complete surprise. Thats just what I think, anyway.
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