1. Post #1
    Gold Member
    MenteR's Avatar
    July 2007
    5,432 Posts
    the first thread for those who missed it: http://www.facepunch.com/threads/1110595



    you are a duck called dimitri. you have a mustache and a suit and you...

    ...don't live in your own private lake anymore.

    you used to roam the streets and nightclubs of lakeland until someday the ~american crisis~ hit you hard.



    nowadays you're homeless, but you still got it going. spending most of the day on the sidewalk of st. saint ducklins, begging for money, you wish that someday you'll visit las vegas.

    I WON'T BE UPDATING THESE SO REGULARLY LIKE THE FIRST ONE, BUT DON'T WORRY, I'LL TRY TO UPDATE IT EVERYDAY!
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Winner Winner x 3Friendly Friendly x 2 (list)

  2. Post #2
    Oh no, what have I done!
    Dennab
    November 2007
    22,049 Posts
    call your duck friend on the phone

    you need a companion to go to vegas with you.
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 United States Show Events Agree Agree x 2 (list)

  3. Post #3
    MrTwicks's Avatar
    November 2009
    2,395 Posts
    an hero
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows Vista Australia Show Events Agree Agree x 3Dumb Dumb x 1Disagree Disagree x 1 (list)

  4. Post #4
    Badboyuk's Avatar
    October 2011
    184 Posts
    Use the money you have to buy a gun ,then use the gun to rob a bank .
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Turkey Show Events Agree Agree x 1 (list)

  5. Post #5
    Scampi's Avatar
    December 2011
    6 Posts
    rob a bank or some shit

  6. Post #6
    Ask me about my 'female train' fetish.
    Dennab
    January 2006
    5,457 Posts
    Check your money can.

  7. Post #7
    Gold Member
    MenteR's Avatar
    July 2007
    5,432 Posts
    rob a bank or some shit
    Use the money you have to buy a gun ,then use the gun to rob a bank .


    you tell your hobo friend that you'd like to rob a bank and he gets you a nice shiny gun.



    you guys burst in lakeland's house of money, a p famous bank in lakeland. everybody shits their pants.



    those cashiers handle the money to you like a bunch of ducks. heh, i'm witty.



    you both go down the street shootin' and duckin'. what an awesome scene.



    too bad the donut store is right around the corner.

    Edited:

    what next?

    Edited:

    SHOULD I WORK ON A 2D SIDESCROLLER OF DIMITRI THE DUCK? WOULD YOU PLAY IT?
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Agree Agree x 6Disagree Disagree x 1 (list)

  8. Post #8
    Badboyuk's Avatar
    October 2011
    184 Posts
    Yes i would play it , and also shoot dat pig

  9. Post #9
    Dosen't need a bigger avatar
    vladnag's Avatar
    April 2010
    3,199 Posts
    i would love a 2D duck game
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows Vista United Kingdom Show Events Agree Agree x 1 (list)

  10. Post #10
    Krinkels's Avatar
    March 2011
    3,677 Posts
    A sidescroller lacks the openendedness and wit of an MSP Interactive.
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Canada Show Events Agree Agree x 2 (list)

  11. Post #11
    8==== ===== ===== ===== ===D
    Dennab
    April 2008
    4,831 Posts
    make a thread about it

  12. Post #12
    NichoGialluca's Avatar
    December 2011
    10 Posts
    Tell a nice, but racist, joke to the officer and make friends with him (he also likes money). Then invite him to go to the Grand Theater downtown, to see that new play, Black Swan. While in the play, ask him to join you in your newest idea, a scheme to control all the city's drug dealing by killing all the drug dealers and buying some lands in Colombia. He agrees, but have one condition. He wants to ask some of his palls at the station to the plan. You agree, or not. It's up to you my friend.

    Or, just paint the walls with his brains and run like hell.
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Agree Agree x 1 (list)

  13. Post #13
    _Vendetta_'s Avatar
    May 2011
    945 Posts
    Blow off his manhood,then while he is on he ground crying,shoot his eyes out.After letting him lie like this in agony for a minute,end his misery by shooting him in the head.

  14. Post #14
    Gold Member
    MenteR's Avatar
    July 2007
    5,432 Posts
    Tell a nice, but racist, joke to the officer and make friends with him (he also likes money). Then invite him to go to the Grand Theater downtown, to see that new play, Black Swan. While in the play, ask him to join you in your newest idea, a scheme to control all the city's drug dealing by killing all the drug dealers and buying some lands in Colombia. He agrees, but have one condition. He wants to ask some of his palls at the station to the plan. You agree, or not. It's up to you my friend.

    Or, just paint the walls with his brains and run like hell.


    you tell him your wittiest joke about african ducks.



    but i don't think he appreciates the fact that a bank robber's telling him a joke.



    you get the living shit beat out of you. oh boy.



    and... you're jailed up. again. good job dimitri. your friend escaped, by the way. with all the cash.

    he's rich.

    and you're jailed with a black duck named "tyrone" as your cellmate.

    but hey, at least the sun is smiling.

    Edited:

    what now?
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Funny Funny x 6Friendly Friendly x 1 (list)

  15. Post #15
    Gold Member
    JustGman's Avatar
    December 2005
    6,058 Posts
    Rip off his bill and carve it into a shank.

  16. Post #16
    Crazy Nuts's Avatar
    November 2011
    185 Posts
    Have him tell the same joke he told the cop. Who knows, Tyrone might respect him afterwards.

  17. Post #17
    Gold Member
    MenteR's Avatar
    July 2007
    5,432 Posts
    Have him tell the same joke he told the cop. Who knows, Tyrone might respect him afterwards.


    you tell the funny joke to your cellmate.



    it doesn't work out that well. maybe it has to do with him being a ni- a black duck.

    Edited:

    well, the sun sure isn't smiling anymore.

    what now?
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Funny Funny x 13 (list)

  18. Post #18
    Holy Altnir's Avatar
    September 2010
    1,624 Posts
    HOLY SHIT YOU'RE BACK. I LOVE YOU.
    Enjoy the free sex and become his sex slave.
    Kiss him passionately after he finishes.
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Israel Show Events Optimistic Optimistic x 2 (list)

  19. Post #19
    Gold Member
    Géza!'s Avatar
    January 2008
    6,124 Posts
    Make a racist duck-gang and take revenge on Tyrone

  20. Post #20
    Sherd Red's Avatar
    September 2011
    1,544 Posts
    Go back in time and this time call Duke Nukem to beat the shit out of the pig cop.

  21. Post #21
    Crazy Nuts's Avatar
    November 2011
    185 Posts
    Have the poor duck go take a bath, I mean he just got raped.

    Then have him plot a devious revenge on Tyrone, who obviously has no sense of humor.

  22. Post #22
    Dosen't need a bigger avatar
    vladnag's Avatar
    April 2010
    3,199 Posts
    point out a chicken to him, he will go beserk and scream "FRYING TIME" then while the guards are trying to stop him you can escape

  23. Post #23
    _Vendetta_'s Avatar
    May 2011
    945 Posts
    Well,now that you've got a reputation as a racist,might as well take advantage of it,as wrong as that sounds.
    After the black duck has finished with you,rally all of the imprisoned KKK members in the prison to form a group of angry,racist ducks and take over the prison.

  24. Post #24
    Gold Member
    MenteR's Avatar
    July 2007
    5,432 Posts
    point out a chicken to him, he will go beserk and scream "FRYING TIME" then while the guards are trying to stop him you can escape


    you point out bobby the rooster to tyrone.





    that dude's got problems.



    you point out tyrone to the cops.



    well. seems like you got the cops distracted. you decide to escape the prison.



    eh, you're back at the streets.

    Edited:

    what now?
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Winner Winner x 2 (list)

  25. Post #25
    Crazy Nuts's Avatar
    November 2011
    185 Posts
    Have Dimitri sell himself on the street, he's obviously lost all sensory in his rectum, Tyrone's bill was huge!

    Afterwards find a gun and rob a convenience store, banks are too risky.

  26. Post #26
    NichoGialluca's Avatar
    December 2011
    10 Posts
    Disguise yourself as a horse and try to get to the Horse Club. As you know, it is a club with tennis courts, a huge golf camp, bar and restaurant, only for the richests people in town, the horses. As you try to get it, you make friends with an also disguised fish, named Mike.
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Funny Funny x 2 (list)

  27. Post #27
    _Vendetta_'s Avatar
    May 2011
    945 Posts
    Take what little money you have in your money can there,then go rob a bank again,but this time take care to not tell any cops racist jokes.

  28. Post #28
    Really, really, really, really likes parrots and water caustics. Also, hates titles.
    Aurora93's Avatar
    March 2009
    11,686 Posts
    invest in the federal reserve

  29. Post #29
    Holy Altnir's Avatar
    September 2010
    1,624 Posts
    Join the FBI and search your gorilla lover from before.

  30. Post #30
    Sherd Red's Avatar
    September 2011
    1,544 Posts
    Go back to that doughnut shop but this time bring Duke Nukem with you.

  31. Post #31
    Gold Member
    MenteR's Avatar
    July 2007
    5,432 Posts
    Disguise yourself as a horse and try to get to the Horse Club. As you know, it is a club with tennis courts, a huge golf camp, bar and restaurant, only for the richests people in town, the horses. As you try to get it, you make friends with an also disguised fish, named Mike.


    you get yourself one of those realistic horse masks on a nearby hat store.



    you get to the horse club. everything seems nice so far.

















    yeah... it didn't work that well.

    Edited:

    what now?
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Funny Funny x 8 (list)

  32. Post #32
    I wish I had a tentacle hand. Japan would pay billions for some real-life tentacles.
    Bokito's Avatar
    February 2009
    4,616 Posts
    Try to find your hobo friend by breaking into the FBI's office to get your share of the money.

  33. Post #33
    Badboyuk's Avatar
    October 2011
    184 Posts
    Break into your hobo friends house,card board box and try and find clues on where he has gone .

  34. Post #34
    Dosen't need a bigger avatar
    vladnag's Avatar
    April 2010
    3,199 Posts
    go to a duck club, horse clubs are overrated any way

  35. Post #35
    Ghost656's Avatar
    April 2010
    1,484 Posts
    Search the can with a dollar sign on it.

  36. Post #36
    FUCK OFF garry, I am a goddamn proud swedish moose, not a fucking british heathen!
    Sokrates's Avatar
    July 2010
    3,226 Posts
    do a backflip

    also, why does he look like le quack

    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 United Kingdom Show Events Agree Agree x 2 (list)

  37. Post #37
    _Vendetta_'s Avatar
    May 2011
    945 Posts
    Steal some cocaine and start a drug dealing business.

  38. Post #38
    NichoGialluca's Avatar
    December 2011
    10 Posts
    Yeah, sure. Do a backflip. That sounds like a great, creative and contributive idea to the history.
    At least it won't get you in prison again.

  39. Post #39
    Gold Member
    MenteR's Avatar
    July 2007
    5,432 Posts
    do a backflip
    Yeah, sure. Do a backflip. That sounds like a great, creative and contributive idea to the history.
    At least it won't get you in prison again.













    i forgot to mention that backflipping is prohibited by law in lakeland.
    Reply With Quote Edit / Delete Reply Windows 7 Brazil Show Events Funny Funny x 10Informative Informative x 1Winner Winner x 1Optimistic Optimistic x 1 (list)

  40. Post #40
    Gold Member
    Géza!'s Avatar
    January 2008
    6,124 Posts
    Do a forward-flip then.

    Surely, you'll be released on parole.