[thisispain]

DrBreen posted:

From you guy's perspective is kissing on a first date such a bad thing?

kissing is okay
sex is better though

[DrBreen]

Ill leave it for the second date!

Edited:

Ill be honest though, i'm a terrible kisser, no matter how much practice i have
its like my handwritting

[JohanGS]

No offense but I don't think you have been practising enough

[flamehead5]

I went out with that girl again, we had another great time, we laughed and talked for a long time and it overall turned out great. Just one confusion though, when we got close to her home, we have gone our separate ways before getting really near either house, today when we got close I offered to walk her home, but she said no even when I offered multiple times, what does that mean? I have made it clear that I am not some dick who just wants to sleep with her, I haven't even made a move to kiss her at all even against all my feeling towards her.

[Glitch360]

flamehead5 posted:

I went out with that girl again, we had another great time, we laughed and talked for a long time and it overall turned out great. Just one confusion though, when we got close to her home, we have gone our separate ways before getting really near either house, today when we got close I offered to walk her home, but she said no even when I offered multiple times, what does that mean? I have made it clear that I am not some dick who just wants to sleep with her, I haven't even made a move to kiss her at all even against all my feeling towards her.

Maybe her family has issues with her having a boyfriend?

[flamehead5]

And I don't even know if I should call it a date or not because it has not been acknowledged by either of us that it was a date, but we have just walked around a large area together for like 3-4 hours.

[Oicani Gonzales]

DrBreen posted:

Ill be honest though, i'm a terrible kisser, no matter how much practice i have
its like my handwritting

kissing is almost a natural thing, kind of like sex
theres the practice part and theres the you part in my experience

Edited:

flamehead5 posted:

And I don't even know if I should call it a date or not because it has not been acknowledged by either of us that it was a date, but we have just walked around a large area together for like 3-4 hours.

from the sound of it maybe your intentions werent very clear

[DrBreen]

JohanGS posted:

No offense but I don't think you have been practising enough

trust me i had enough practice

[flamehead5]

Oicani Gonzales posted:

kissing is almost a natural thing, kind of like sex
theres the practice part and theres the you part in my experience

Edited:



from the sound of it maybe your intentions werent very clear

Well how do I show her that I might like her?

[1chains1]

DrBreen posted:

trust me i had enough practice

Your hand doesn't count dude.

[GreenDolphin]

flamehead5 posted:

Well how do I show her that I might like her?

It should not have been hard to acknowledge whether or not you two were on a date. If your day went fine for both of you then ask her out again making it clear that you want to go on a date. That's my advice but I'm sure others will know better of what to do.

[flamehead5]

GreenDolphin posted:

It should not have been hard to acknowledge whether or not you two were on a date. If your day went fine for both of you then ask her out again making it clear that you want to go on a date. That's my advice but I'm sure others will know better of what to do.

I don't really know how to ask.

[DrBreen]

1chains1 posted:

Your hand doesn't count dude.

yeah i make out with my hand a lot

[Mon]

i give my fingers blowjobs if they have ketchup on them

[flamehead5]

I am really depressed not knowing if we are going out or not, because I don't know if I can hold her hand or have ANY FUCKING REAL HUMAN INTERACTION other than talking, I love spending time with her, but I can't go on not knowing, I have a great time but I can't help but feel that I have really fucked up my not holding her hand or shit like that. I just don't know what to do.

[JoshJosh117]

Just an update to my situation that some of you may or may not remember. I really want to ask the girl out, but there hasn't really been an opportunity (the two of us haven't been relatively alone). I know trying to catch her after class is an option but I feel it would be easier if I'm talking to her beforehand or something.

[Oicani Gonzales]

flamehead5 posted:

I am really depressed not knowing if we are going out or not, because I don't know if I can hold her hand or have ANY FUCKING REAL HUMAN INTERACTION other than talking, I love spending time with her, but I can't go on not knowing, I have a great time but I can't help but feel that I have really fucked up my not holding her hand or shit like that. I just don't know what to do.

maybe ask her out on a date (in italic)?

[[CWG]RustySpannerz]

JohnnyMo1 posted:

Imma ask this girl out tomorrow I can't wait.

Edited:

I'm excited and feel like I'm gonna hurl at the same time.

Did you get a chance?

[flamehead5]

Oicani Gonzales posted:

maybe ask her out on a date (in italic)?

HOW.

[Evilan]

flamehead5 posted:

HOW.

Say "Hey, we should go on a date."

Although, if you're getting worked up over a single girl like this, it might be time to take a step back and re-evaluate the situation a bit. You shouldn't feel the need to kill yourself because someone may or may not be going out with you.

[flamehead5]

Evilan posted:

Say "Hey, we should go on a date."

Although, if you're getting worked up over a single girl like this, it might be time to take a step back and re-evaluate the situation a bit. You shouldn't feel the need to kill yourself because someone may or may not be going out with you.

She is the single most attractive girl I have ever seen and we have more in common than almost anyone else I know and she actually hangs out with me unlike any other girl that just ignored me. People said throughout highschool and even after "There will be some people like will want to go out with you" Well there is no some, there is one, and I won't spend another 17 years alone because I lose her. I have done things to get her attention and talk to her that I have done for nobody else, because there is some connection inside, some spark that drives me to try to be with her, a feeling that has never been felt in my life.

[Evilan]

flamehead5 posted:

She is the single most attractive girl I have ever seen and we have more in common than almost anyone else I know and she actually hangs out with me unlike any other girl that just ignored me. People said throughout highschool and even after "There will be some people like will want to go out with you" Well there is no some, there is one, and I won't spend another 17 years alone because I lose her. I have done things to get her attention and talk to her that I have done for nobody else, because there is some connection inside, some spark that drives me to try to be with her, a feeling that has never been felt in my life.

Dude, you're so drunk with infatuation you don't even realize it. There is only one way this is going to end for you and that is in more disappointment if you try to pursue her. Dating her is only going to mask your obvious emotional instability and when she dumps you, you're going to be right back here. Except you won't even have her as a friend, let alone a love interest.

You need to take a step back and look to balance your emotions. You're still in high school and you still have your youth. You'll find someone, even if it may not be her.

[flamehead5]

Evilan posted:

Dude, you're so drunk with infatuation you don't even realize it. There is only one way this is going to end for you and that is in more disappointment if you try to pursue her. Dating her is only going to mask your obvious emotional instability and when she dumps you, you're going to be right back here. Except you won't even have her as a friend, let alone a love interest.

You need to take a step back and look to balance your emotions. You're still in high school and you still have your youth. You'll find someone, even if it may not be her.

So what your saying ultimately is, I will not possibly get her even though I haven't said any of this to her (And I am not in highschool thanks)

I just had a talk with a good friend who just simply advised me to be patient because we have a lot in common and we enjoy eachothers company.

[Evilan]

flamehead5 posted:

So what your saying ultimately is, I will not possibly get her even though I haven't said any of this to her (And I am not in highschool thanks)

I just had a talk with a good friend who just simply advised me to be patient because we have a lot in common and we enjoy eachothers company.

You'll probably get her, but it won't be long before she dumps you as you currently are. At least listen to your friend if you won't listen to me. He's right, be patient and work out your issues first (like the obvious infatuation).

[flamehead5]

Evilan posted:

You'll probably get her, but it won't be long before she dumps you as you currently are. At least listen to your friend if you won't listen to me. He's right, be patient and work out your issues first (like the obvious infatuation).

So she is going to dump me because I am afraid that I can't ask her out....

[Evilan]

flamehead5 posted:

So she is going to dump me because I am afraid that I can't ask her out....

What are you talking about? We're past the subject of you asking her out. The answer to that question is don't.

The reason you shouldn't ask her out is because of your post in the "Depression Chat Thread." Thinking about killing yourself because you can't ask her out and saying "I won't spend another 17 years alone because I lose her" because you don't have her is not normal thinking. Work on changing your mindset before even considering going further than friends with her.

[flamehead5]

Evilan posted:

What are you talking about? We're past the subject of you asking her out. The answer to that question is don't.

The reason you shouldn't ask her out is because of your post in the "Depression Chat Thread." Thinking about killing yourself because you can't ask her out and saying "I won't spend another 17 years alone because I lose her" because you don't have her is not normal thinking. Work on changing your mindset before even considering going further than friends with her.

Just sick of feeling alone I guess, I was feeling pretty shitty, but I feel quite a bit better now.

[JohnnyMo1]

Euuuugh. I didn't ask that girl out. I've told myself I didn't really get a decent chance tonight and while that's partially true it might be half rationalization. Regardless, I got home, put my hand on the doorknob and went aaaaaaAAAAAUUUGGHH fuck now I have to wait around like a twat another two days. I think I might die of anticipation.

Now if you'll excuse me:

[Jmir 54]

JohnnyMo1 posted:

Euuuugh. I didn't ask that girl out. I've told myself I didn't really get a decent chance tonight and while that's partially true it might be half rationalization. Regardless, I got home, put my hand on the doorknob and went aaaaaaAAAAAUUUGGHH fuck now I have to wait around like a twat another two days. I think I might die of anticipation.

Now if you'll excuse me:

[KitAlexHarrison]

It's times like these I'd rather people flat-out told me they weren't interested rather than leaving me hanging on my feelings. It hurts when you find out she's interested in another guy when she confides said information with your best friend.

[Evilan]

JohnnyMo1 posted:

Euuuugh. I didn't ask that girl out. I've told myself I didn't really get a decent chance tonight and while that's partially true it might be half rationalization. Regardless, I got home, put my hand on the doorknob and went aaaaaaAAAAAUUUGGHH fuck now I have to wait around like a twat another two days. I think I might die of anticipation.

Call her up. Ask to meet up somewhere. Do shit with her. Say it was fun. Ask if she wants to go out on an actual date next time.

You can do it mang.

[ffffff-]

Hi there, I come seeking advice.

So yesterday our college had it's Valentines ball. Skipping out most of the story, a girl who I think was into me and I her snogged in what was probably a moment of drunken ecstasy. The problem is that I've upset her somehow and her friends are giving me shit for it.

I plan on talking to her on Monday, but I don't really know what I should say. Any advice there?

[Evilan]

ffffff- posted:

Hi there, I come seeking advice.

So yesterday our college had it's Valentines ball. Skipping out most of the story, a girl who I think was into me and I her snogged in what was probably a moment of drunken ecstasy. The problem is that I've upset her somehow and her friends are giving me shit for it.

I plan on talking to her on Monday, but I don't really know what I should say. Any advice there?

I had a professor who always liked to tell us stories about his divorces and how he salvaged the friendship he shared with those he separated from. My advice to you is to confront the situation directly, just make sure you figure out what's bugging her. Since you're a bit vague on the details as to why she might be a little pissy (possibly crappy kisser), you may be forced to deal with the situation yourself. Just try to be civil about it, and don't raise your voice to her. It's okay to mad with whatever she has to say, just try not to act out on it.

[DrBreen]

so i've been with the girl from my date yesterday and we were talking we agreed that a relationship would ruin what we have and decided to be just friends with benefits, then we see how it goes from then on.

lets see how this goes, kind of relief for me since i was worried she was one of those needy relationship girls

[junker|154]

Friends with benefits is a really awesome thing, but usually it ends bad.

Either way someone is starting to having feelings or finds another guy. Although I prefer a full relationship.

[Seith]

the 2nd option isn't bad at all, because to begin with you guys declared "friends with benefits"

[DrBreen]

junker|154 posted:

Friends with benefits is a really awesome thing, but usually it ends bad.

Either way someone is starting to having feelings or finds another guy. Although I prefer a full relationship.

we decided that if we have stronger feelings for each other over time, and we probably will, then we go for the full thing.

We discussed how we should start becoming real friends and then moving on our thing as we go, so being friends with benefits is really great especially since we get to become friends AND have the benefits of a relationship without being in one. All for one day that we do have a relationship it will be less prone to failure.

seems like a good plan

[junker|154]

Sounds a bit weird though and does not make any sense. Just take things natural.
But everyone is different, eh?

[JenkinsJ]

So I went to go home (family home) today to get a nice break, but it was snowing and the train was cancelled. And then the next train was delayed. And then cancelled. So I just went back to my house, gonna stay in with a book and a glass of wine. Or a J.

Also I've decided to actually try and quit smoking cigarettes! Like properly. I have this snazzy e-cig to help:

[JohnnyMo1]

Evilan posted:

Call her up. Ask to meet up somewhere. Do shit with her. Say it was fun. Ask if she wants to go out on an actual date next time.

You can do it mang.

Unfortunately I don't have her number. I'm really bad about that. I have an assortment of my friends' phone numbers without much rhyme or reason.

Now that I think about it it was best I didn't do anything last night since I had absolutely no idea what to do with her. We live in a smallish town and neither of us have cars. That limits us slightly for options.

Edited:

I should see her tomorrow so that gives me today to figure something out.