[Red Heavy]

How do you guys manage to get a powerful army so fast? Seriously, it seems that every time I start making armor while I have wrestlers training they get spine injuries.

[HALP Cat]

How the fuck do your wrestlers manage to get any injuries at all? All injuries that my dwarves get are regarding their reputation as their clothes are all over the barracks.

[OpethRockr55]

Yeah, sounds like you got some pussy dwarves, Heavy. Dwarf 'em up a bit.

[Teh Zip File]

Red Heavy posted:

How do you guys manage to get a powerful army so fast? Seriously, it seems that every time I start making armor while I have wrestlers training they get spine injuries.

Set a bunch of wrestlers with some kind of armor (Doesn't have to be that strong) and give them shields.

An in-game year later you'll have legendary wrestler/shield users.

Edited:

After that you can give them weapons and they'll dodge/block almost every hit.

[Angua]

deepneau posted:

This game is the epitome of a game that spreads itself too thin and therefore achieves granting the player a sub-par experience that is both aggravating and hopelessly lacking entertainment. First, this game is only popular due to the fact that most of it's players are masochists on a mission to play the most pointless game ever. In fact, this game seems like a complete joke: blending extremely ugly ASCII graphics with gameplay that ranks up there with Big Rigs. The developers of this game are quite obviously playing all of you fools who claim this game as the messiah of strategy games. I honestly feel immense pity for those who believe this game is good: clearly they have no taste in games.

I think you have no taste of games that's like saying Transport tycoon deluxe is shit because of the graphics or tiberium sun! What next, saying that all german people are nazies!

[OpethRockr55]

Fuck, that was two pages ago. Drop it. The guy's an ass, we get it.

[Zatharon]

HALP Cat posted:

Just release some goblins in there.

I actually had some caged goblins, but I stripped them naked and threw them in a 7 story deep pit a carved out instead.

[Orkel]

Red Heavy posted:

How do you guys manage to get a powerful army so fast? Seriously, it seems that every time I start making armor while I have wrestlers training they get spine injuries.

Only activate military after you have a full set of armor, either chain, plate or chain+plate.

Leggings/greaves, helm, chainmail/platemail, gauntlets (only for plate set), high boots, shield.

[Pacmaney]

Just spent a good hour and a half reading the epic tale of Boatmurdered, I am tempted to start a succession game now.

[Eleventeen]

[BlueSaint]

Is there a program/utility to create npcs such as goblins and all so I can have some fun with an arena in my small secure fort of doom?

[Zatharon]

not that I know of, just make a bunch of cage traps and catch them then chuck them in the pit after stripping them naked.

[BlueSaint]

Yea but I don't have any seiges or anything because it is a small fort.

[Zatharon]

ahahaha, some goblin just snatched a baby, from a marksdwarf that was hanging out outside iwth some of her friends, within 3 seconds he had about 10 bolts in him, one of which pierced his heart and left lung.

Edited:

Oh, random question, what kind a dorfs do you primarily use in your military? I like speardwarfs mostly, I have a squad of 20 and there's only one drawbridge into my fort, every time there's a siege I just put my marksdwarves on the walls and station my speardwarves on the bridge, much goblin piercing follows.

[johnlukeg]

I usually make Swordsmen, because swords do slashing and piercing damage. I used to have 100% spearmen and crossbowmen, but a bronze colossus showed up and taught me how "Bronze isn't easy to pierce". I also keep a couple hammer dwarves around for those damn colossi.

[Darth_GW7]

I make a shit ton of Crossbowdwarves, because then I just chuck them in towers around my fortress and I'm protected.

[Eleventeen]

I went to look at my mayor, the dwarf that was immobalized due to being shot with an arrow in the lower body, bruising his spine. He's up and working now!

[Vandl92]

Zatharon posted:

Oh, random question, what kind a dorfs do you primarily use in your military? I like speardwarfs mostly, I have a squad of 20 and there's only one drawbridge into my fort, every time there's a siege I just put my marksdwarves on the walls and station my speardwarves on the bridge, much goblin piercing follows.

Hammerdwarves are where it's at.

[Orkel]

Zatharon posted:

ahahaha, some goblin just snatched a baby, from a marksdwarf that was hanging out outside iwth some of her friends, within 3 seconds he had about 10 bolts in him, one of which pierced his heart and left lung.

Edited:

Oh, random question, what kind a dorfs do you primarily use in your military? I like speardwarfs mostly, I have a squad of 20 and there's only one drawbridge into my fort, every time there's a siege I just put my marksdwarves on the walls and station my speardwarves on the bridge, much goblin piercing follows.

Hammerdwarves. Deadly sparring accidents are incredibly rare (as opposed to speardwarves, which have the highest chance due to piercing attack type) and it's awesome to see hammerchamps send enemies flying 40+ tiles away. And hammers don't get stuck in your enemy's flesh.

[johnlukeg]

The only downside to hammers is no clean decapitations.

But I guess if you prefer little kobold explosions anyway...

[Darth_GW7]

I enjoy watching kobold thieves managing to escape the inside of my fortress, running away all :smug: 'cause they can get past my forbidden doors. Then POW! I leave pesky kobold thief a BOLT TO THE HEAD.

[Zatharon]

Some fucking speardwarf just went berserk in the barracks, stabbed one of my 3 Spearmasters to death while he was sleeping, then (thankfully) killed the two braindead dwarves that were in there, and then stabbed a baby before getting shot down by a marksdwarf.

[HALP Cat]

Did the baby survive?

[BlueSaint]

I found some cave walrus's
well naked mole dogs but maydays tile set makes them look like a cave walrus.

[HALP Cat]

Hahahaha, brb modding in a cave walrus.

[BlueSaint]

DOO IT!
and make them friendly, and allow them to be taken along with you at the start.
walrus leather, :smug:

[Zatharon]

HALP Cat posted:

Did the baby survive?

No, it bled to death, surprisingly the mother was holding it while sleeping, and he only stabbed the baby. I'm glad though, there are 44 goddamn children in my fort of 225, my dwarves need to learn the meaning of "birth control"

[Darth_GW7]

This is a Bauxite condom. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with -censored- , decorated with Ash and encircled with bands of Gypsum. This object menaces with spikes of Kaolinite and Tiger Iron.
There's your birth control.

[BlueSaint]

lol.
remember the wood condoms give your dwarfs splinters.

[Kwal]

Zatharon posted:

No, it bled to death, surprisingly the mother was holding it while sleeping, and he only stabbed the baby. I'm glad though, there are 44 goddamn children in my fort of 225, my dwarves need to learn the meaning of "birth control"

The baby died in the mother's arms.
:(

[HALP Cat]

Darth_GW7 posted:

This is a Bauxite condom. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with -censored- , decorated with Ash and encircled with bands of Gypsum. This object menaces with spikes of Kaolinite and Tiger Iron.
There's your birth control.

It's made of cave walrus leather you fool.

Edited:

And it ignites on the first use.

[Darth_GW7]

My first human caravan has arrived, 5 years into the game.
Should I flood the depot, drowning them, gaining free items while possibly threatening my fort's security at a later date? Or should I trade with them like an honest dwarf should?

[KestasLT]

Darth_GW7 posted:

My first human caravan has arrived, 5 years into the game.
Should I flood the depot, drowning them, gaining free items while possibly threatening my fort's security at a later date? Or should I trade with them like an honest dwarf should?

Build a wall around the depot.
Let them go beserk
And watch the fun

[Darth_GW7]

I've just realised all the children in my fort are naked :pedo:

[HALP Cat]

Naked vomit covered dwarf children. :pedo:

[Darth_GW7]

Don't forget the blood.

Edited:

And the mud.

[HALP Cat]

And some bruises from cave-ins.

[bodenlan2]

this game seems so extremely boring

[Nenghis]

bodenlan2 posted:

this game seems so extremely boring

Have you tried it?

[Pacmaney]

My fort is drowning in tidal waves of discarded clothes! How do I get rid of them!