1. Post #1
    goatse
    Craptasket's Avatar
    January 2006
    32,725 Posts
    Oh Hi, welcome to my thread about floor naps

    Every once in a while, we need to take a breather and relax ourselves in order to deal with the outside world. Napping ON THE FLOOR can help refresh and refocus the mind in order to be more productive. Trust me, floor naps are best naps, and I'm here to tell you about the floor naps. So unless you live in a all hardwood house, there is no excuse.
    Floor naps are great, really! whats not to like about floor naps, floor naps, floor naps, floor naps...

    [release]
    The Real OP:
    Me and dragon were steam chatting and i'm pulling a late night, this dude is like,
    "uhm woke up from the floor dunno how I got there but wow it was great"
    I'm like "dergon dont u got a big bed for ur dergonness"
    "nope, floor naps own"
    "uhm really cus u know it's great when you're wrecked from a party and all but regularly???"
    "stfu and make me a thread about it"
    "WOW"
    "do ittt"
    [/release]


    Get a load of this chill dude, he's away from the hardwood. Fucking Pro. (heh hardwood, rrerr)


    Yeah really just lay on your floor and take a good nap, you wont regret it!



    Hey man after all this talk I'm feeling a good floor nap coming on me, so I wrote some quick facts

    [release]
    1. Your back will thank you. If you sleep on the floor your back will really just thank you, straight up dude, it thanks me every time and serves me breakfast.

    2. It will make you cooler. Heat rises in the summer, so sleeping on the floor will make you cooler than all fuck. Even in the winter this would enable you to sleep better, by allowing you to snuggle down in blankets without worrying about overheating and being uncool!

    3. It will be healthier. Futons are for PUSSIES they're light and portable enough you can take them outside and air them in the sunshine on occasion. This will not only freshen your PUSSY WHIPPED futon, but help in eliminating any critters like bedbugs that may be nesting within. Try doing that with a regular mattress! (don't)

    4. You won't have to beg or hire some dude to help you move your sicknasty love bed. Think! FLOORS DON'T MOVE STUPID. Compare that with the average mattress/box spring set that takes two people to move and a truck, trailer or large van to transport.

    5. You will BANK CASH$. It costs less to invest in a GOOD DAMN FLOOR than it does to purchase a bed, mattress and box springs. If you are on a budget, this may enable you to afford a higher bla bla bla

    6. It is better on the environment. YES I WILL TYPE ABOUT GREEN MARKETING STRATEGIES TO MAKE YOU REGRET LEAVING THE BATHROOM LIGHT AT NIGHT OR TAKING THE LONGER ROUTE TO WORK.
    [/release]

    Post here so I can shout slogans and product advertisements at you


    I hope you have been educated today on this
    dergon approved education
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  2. Post #2
    Equal Moderator
    Dragon's Avatar
    April 2005
    5,297 Posts
    I'm dragon and I just took a floor nap!!
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  3. Post #3
    But that's where I shit.

    I will not sleep on my faeces.
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  4. Post #4
    dicks, my man
    Schlinky's Avatar
    August 2010
    5,575 Posts
    Is it OK to have a pillow?
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  5. Post #5
    Dennab
    March 2008
    1,318 Posts
    floor naps and why they're nasty because your goddamn feet touch it motherfucker

    but honestly when I'd spend my summer vacations in grade school over at my aunt's 24/7 I'd always crash on the floor. Whenever I woke up I always had the energy to hop straight to my feet instead of wanting more sleep or whatever, and felt perfectly fine. So I guess that was a pro of floor naps
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  6. Post #6
    Gold Member
    Mooe94's Avatar
    January 2006
    6,843 Posts
    I had a floornap before but our dog and cat shit and puked on it so we threw it all away
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  7. Post #7
    Gold Member
    Higginz511's Avatar
    February 2009
    5,856 Posts
    i am too poor for a bed i must floornap 24/7
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  8. Post #8
    You mean people don't do this?
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  9. Post #9
    goatse
    Craptasket's Avatar
    January 2006
    32,725 Posts
    Ok. But it's not comfortable.
    Referencing this post for "someone not hardcore"
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  10. Post #10
    Gold Member
    midlet_guy's Avatar
    February 2007
    1,614 Posts
    It's good for your hardwood
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  11. Post #11
    Gold Member
    Nathax's Avatar
    November 2008
    1,573 Posts
    Floornaps are the bomb! Love em!
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  12. Post #12
    Gold Member
    RR_Raptor65's Avatar
    February 2006
    3,300 Posts
    I sleep on the floor during the summer when it's too hot to sleep in bed.
    Dirt naps are where it's at though.
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  13. Post #13
    ಥ益ಥ ... Beautiful.
    Kill001's Avatar
    April 2006
    12,042 Posts
    I have a tatami mat

    Feels good man
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  14. Post #14
    goatse
    Craptasket's Avatar
    January 2006
    32,725 Posts
    Craptasket: hi
    damn chimera: helo
    Craptasket: how was the floor nap
    damn chimera: it was really good
    damn chimera: but i woke up and was like
    damn chimera: wtf am i on the floor
    Craptasket: im posting this chatlog
    damn chimera: lol
    Craptasket: thx for the interview
    Results are in: they're "really good"
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  15. Post #15

    May 2005
    223 Posts
    Yeah but after a half month of sleeping on the floor your back/neck starts to hurt like a bitch.
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  16. Post #16
    Gold Member
    Lonestriper's Avatar
    September 2008
    5,723 Posts
    Is the cat necessary for floor naps?
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  17. Post #17
    Hi, my name is mastermaul, and I'm a butt.
    mastermaul's Avatar
    January 2008
    8,389 Posts
    I probably would if my floor was bigger and more comfortable.
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  18. Post #18
    Equal Moderator
    Dragon's Avatar
    April 2005
    5,297 Posts
    The cat is an accessory $19.95 buy now
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  19. Post #19
    BurnEmDown's Avatar
    September 2009
    4,638 Posts
    What about having sex, is it better on the floor too?
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  20. Post #20
    Gold Member
    Monkeytracks's Avatar
    January 2009
    3,160 Posts
    My carpet in my room is apparently more comfortable than my mates bed. It is really nice though.
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  21. Post #21
    Gold Member
    Higginz511's Avatar
    February 2009
    5,856 Posts
    The cat is an accessory $19.95 buy now
    can i get a coupon?
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  22. Post #22
    Gold Member
    Lonestriper's Avatar
    September 2008
    5,723 Posts
    The cat is an accessory $19.95 buy now
    I'll trade you food stamps
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  23. Post #23
    Gold Member
    Mooe94's Avatar
    January 2006
    6,843 Posts
    sometimes I wrap myself up with floornaps and grunt like I'm a god damned stuffed tortilla

    seeing as I spill food all the time on the floor you actually start to smell like meat once you have been in there for 30 minutes
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  24. Post #24
    Dennab
    August 2008
    4,435 Posts
    I have a hardwood floor, what do I do? :saddowns:
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  25. Post #25
    goatse
    Craptasket's Avatar
    January 2006
    32,725 Posts
    Is the cat necessary for floor naps?
    The cat was to appeal to the regular facepunch user
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  26. Post #26
    Rad Cult Member
    Just2Rusty's Avatar
    December 2007
    4,759 Posts
    I fucking love floor naps

    they saved my life
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  27. Post #27
    Gold Member

    March 2005
    4,370 Posts
    I've slept on hardwood floors, it seems ok for the first 10mins but then your spine snaps and locks into a permanent pretzel shape.

    People seem to think it's funny when I sleep on the floor at parties and shit (lol this guy must have passed out like a dickhead) but it feels great.
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  28. Post #28
    RixxzIV's Avatar
    July 2010
    2,005 Posts
    What the fuck is this thread?

    dont fucking reate me dumb u bish
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  29. Post #29
    I got my title for $1
    HendoV2's Avatar
    June 2010
    2,354 Posts
    my carpet is really uncomfortable
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  30. Post #30
    rogasm
    Rolond Returns's Avatar
    May 2010
    4,824 Posts
    craptasket why do you do this to me, my floor is all hardwood
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  31. Post #31
    Pilk's Avatar
    February 2010
    870 Posts
    I air my futon rain, hail or shine.
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  32. Post #32
    I got my title for $1
    HendoV2's Avatar
    June 2010
    2,354 Posts
    what is a futon
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  33. Post #33
    -AJ-'s Avatar
    December 2007
    1,205 Posts
    I floor nap after alcohol
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  34. Post #34
    goatse
    Craptasket's Avatar
    January 2006
    32,725 Posts
    what is a futon
    A way to cheat floor napping (don't let me catch you!)
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  35. Post #35
    Gold Member
    mrmr's Avatar
    September 2008
    4,122 Posts
    Floors are boring, roof naps are better they will keep you cool and get you a tan in the summer at the same time.
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  36. Post #36
    Resident Raccoon
    kaze4159's Avatar
    January 2008
    9,038 Posts
    I've had a floornap before, well it was more like a stairnap but god damn it was good
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  37. Post #37
    hyper-articulate
    Roll_Program's Avatar
    October 2007
    12,538 Posts
    The floor is full of nasty shit and dirt.

    You have a goddam bed for a reason.
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  38. Post #38
    a-k-t-w's Avatar
    March 2008
    3,199 Posts
    My doctor said if I sleep on the floor one more time I will die
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  39. Post #39
    rabbid666's Avatar
    November 2009
    968 Posts
    Can i do Floor Fap?
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  40. Post #40
    Baldr's Avatar
    July 2009
    3,886 Posts
    I only do floor naps when I pass out drunk, thats also like the only time that it is comfortable.
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