Change your doctor.
I think I saw you use the word "toned" last page. I'm gonna give you an early warning that most people that know what they are doing, despise that word. So, avoid it.
y not finish the job and kill yourself?? rofl this is more of some skinny twink wishing for instant results . i so very much disbelieve you know even the smallest of actual truth in regards to anything relating to what this forum is about. id like to say im not going to humour you but sure go ahead and waste some money at the doctors for thorough screening.
rofl for you to think there are no people that were as malnourished as you at or around 22 who later gained weight is retarded
The fact that you want to look like Bieber (who btw, is SKINNY AS FUCK in that photo) and think a 20 lb lighter/earlier version of maucer looks "perfect" makes me not want to help you at all.
But w/e, I will because i am a generous deity. Here it the solution to all your troubles:
Literally you eat like 1500 calories and then you're crying "omg abloo bloo I can't gain any weight!!"
Try eating 4000 calories for at least a month and then come back here.
I can barely get 2000 calories if I tried. Also, school lunches are small. I don't eat breakfast, and a sandwich and a bit of fish with some sort of vegetable isn't going to get me calories fast. Idk if he is in the same situation, but it can be hard get tons of calories.
When i was 16-18 there was plenty of shit for me to eat at home. I'm sure your parents won't object to you cooking, as long as you clean up after yourself (you lazy fuck).
Raid your fucking pantry, I'm sure there's plenty of stuff you can shove into your cum catcher to get more calories in.
Or buy some weight gainer and mix it with milk, drink 3 of these a day. That's like 60-70 carbs and 40-50 grams of protein per shake.
1: Raid pantry
Shake 'n' bake
Special K bars
Italian dressing seasoning
Box of pene
2: "weight gainer" + Milk
Best I can do is make pasta.
As I have said many times, 1500 calories is what I eat NORMALLY which maintains my weight, thus I burn somewhere around that many calories a day.
When trying to gain weight. I go almost double that, somewhere around 2800 calories average. Fuck, the milkshake recipe I made that I drink during weight-gain mode has 1300 calories itself! NO WAY am I burning that many calories by doing what I do each day, by the way, what I do each day is this:
1. Wake up, the second my eyes open, I go to the bathroom and pee.
2. go back to bedroom, sit in fetal position on computer chair, for the rest of the day, unless i have to pee or dookie.
3. go to bed.
"aaaaaaa im so mad because i expect to gain weight in a week because im a stupid sack of shit "-painties
rofl computer all day at 22 and you need your mother to go into the doctor with you. wtf convince me youre not actually severely autistic
Babbies. Babbies everywhere.
Obviously a teen lives with parents, you know, nothing he can do about it. Obviously, the teen doesn't have his own income, but yet, he can ask his parents for money, which they should provide. Obviously you can buy your own food, you know. And obviously you can cook the bought food man...
FFFUCK I WAS COOKING MY OWN EGGS, CHICKEN, PASTA AND WHATEVER AT THE AGE OF 14 and even then I thought I was a babby that learned to make his own food way too late.
Lets assume you don't get money and can't buy your own food.
You can cook the ham you have in fridge, you know. You can pretty much cook anything, you know. You should fucking cook your face omg... Seriously, IMPLYING that cooking is only for bitches.
Is a microwave and computer the only goddamn thing some people can operate these days? o_o
Maybe he's in a low income family. Not everybody is a snooty privileged kiddy after all. I'm in a low income family, and when I want to get even a cheapish protein powder, I have to not buy vitamins, face wash/moisturizer/lip balm, and skip the (non contract) phone bill for the month to do so. It's somewhat hard to stuff your face all day when doing so means you end up eating your mom's and/or brother's food for the day. But I manage to at least eat 1000 more calories than I burn for at least 5-6 days a week, when trying to gain weight.
And it also sucks to have to choose between either
decent, comfortable skin, smooth soft lips, phone service, and bodily energy, but no protein powder.
or the opposite:
dry peeling lips that hurt just from smiling, painful acne, blotchy, oil-slicky face, dry flaky skin, but a jug of protein powder that has never worked before and probably never will, and only serves to bloat my belly and give me gas and the runs.
You don't have to be a rich bitch to bulk in a gym. You don't have to be an athlete, dedicated to sportsmanship to bulk in a gym. All you need are some (few) conditions, like a gym nearby, time and some dosh to get yourself some decent food and a specific, non bitching, persevere mindset.
Protein powders help a lot, but technically, you can live without them if you have the time, resources and will to make your own food.
Also, it is foolish of you to accent an argument upon poorness. I know blokes that are definitely poorer than you, but yet manage to get ripped. I don't swim in dosh either, you know.
The guy I know doesn't even use a phone like you do. He works at a sawmill and barely gets his ropes together. Probably doesn't anymore, haven't talked to him for awhile. There's no way for him of getting some protein powders, but yet he somehow manages to get his shit straight.
Because he actually wants to and finds a way.
I've said more than I should.
Happy bitching on the forums. You've already said enough, don't know about others, but I'm more than sure how your goals will turn out with this kind of attitude. Sorry.
What the fuck, it's called getting a job you pathetic fuck. Don't come balling up in here about your troubles, you are fucking 22 and you still get your mummy to take you to the doctor. Get a job, buy steaks.
What the fuck ever, just taking your bitching elsewhere. We've offered solutions, but somehow I think you are either A) Autistic or B) one of those weird people who get off on bitching your perceived troubles to people, or both. I don't really care.
Here I'll just play devil's advocate and tell you want you so desperately want to hear, if only so you can fuck off from this forum quicker: there is something terribly wrong with you, and we cannot help you, you need to see a doctor, or several.
I'm not sure why you people keep trying to drag on this "yessuh!" "Nuhuh!" shit, but I was under the impression that the thread reached it's conclusion at this post:
Ok I'm sorry for how I treated you.
I admit now it was a little harsh and you totally didn't deserve it.
Just kidding. Tool.
ok i figured it out. hes anorexic and having dellusions as to how much hes eating . ez ez ez ez
and is 22 and takes his mom to the doctor with him
Wait, what ? He's 22 ?
2. Not autistic.
3. My mom goes with me because I'm basically a mute thanks to my disabilities. Rather be 22 and a loser than a 12 year old dickhead who doesn't know how to use punctuation like you.
rofl the only disablity is you having a whole fiasco in your head making you buy into your own delusions of you eating enough. i honestly am not using autistic as an insult here im using it because i truly believe you have some kind of autism ( i would say mental retardation but you are speaking p much normaly)
youre an idiot and wont listen or take steps to fix your problem ofc my only thought of you is that youre an sack of shit here just to complain
And done :)
Think of it like this:
He is asking= who is asking
Him is asking= whom is asking
He is a subject pronoun and him is an object pronoun. A good way to keep these straight is to replace the word who/whom with he/him respectively (or she/her).
It honestly doesn's seem that bad, i've seen way skinnier, and they're fine. I hardly think you've gone "practically mute", due to your skinny-ness. How much do you weigh?
Being honest nobody believes you've been on a big calorie surplus for a long period. There are no huge differences in calorie consumption (in relation to weight, without working out) in healthy people. If you really would not gain weight while eating 1500 calories above maintenance calories you would...
A) have a horrible fucking diarrhea because food would not be absorbed
B) if food would get absorbed, the calories would needed to be used fully so that you don't gain weight. 1500 kcalories = 6.3 megajoules of energy. Due to the laws of thermodynamics, by average your body would need to produce and dissipate 73 watts of more heat energy per second than the average man (which is around 100w at 150 lbs). Basically you'd sweat and smell more than facepunch's fattest fucker and have a heartbeat of probably ~90-100bmp all the time.
As you have not reported any vigorous diarrhea can come into a conclusion
a) Eat 1500 calories above your maintenance, you will gain weight
b) Fuck off
I find it funny that you're badmouthing Casus and Jaeger here tbh, they know their shit and are probably the 2 biggest contributors on this forum
Eat more, fuck off, stop bitching due to your lack of self-discipline and/or willpower