1. Post #1
    elfbarf's Avatar
    July 2011
    364 Posts
    You have to hand it to the TSA.

    When they discovered that eighteen-month-old Riyanna was on the no-fly list (or at least someone with the same name was) they didn’t bat an eye. They didn’t stop and think about whether a one-and-a-half year old posed a security threat, or whether it could possibly be a case of mistaken identity. There’s no time to think in these tense situations.



    No sir, the TSA agents at Ft. Lauderdale airport did what needed to be done and pulled that terror-baby off the plane.

    Up to this point in her life, Riyanna had only ever dropped bombs in her diaper, but that wasn’t fooling the TSA:

    She and her parents had just boarded a JetBlue flight when an airline employee approached them and asked them to get off the plane, saying representatives from the Transportation Security Agency wanted to speak to them.

    “And I said, ‘For what?’” Riyanna’s mother told only WPBF 25 News on Wednesday. “And he said, ‘Well, it’s not you or your husband. Your daughter was flagged as no fly.’ I said, ‘Excuse me?’”

    Riyanna’s father was flabbergasted.

    “It’s absurd,” he said. “It made no sense. Why would an 18-month-old child be on a no-fly list?”
    Why indeed?

    The family was kept off the plane for 30 minutes before being allowed back on. Surprisingly, their 18-month old daughter was not considered a terror threat at the end of the investigation (though the TSA are denying that it was an investigation.)

    Riyanna’s parents believe they were being profiled due to their Middle Eastern descent, and the fact that Riyanna’s mother wears a hijab.

    I think it’s more likely that the TSA just has a bone to pick with anyone who wears diapers. Or who are comfortable walking around naked. Or maybe they just don’t like kids.

    Whatever the case, at least they’re keeping us safe.
    http://www.forbes.com/sites/erikkain...by-from-plane/
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  2. Post #2
    Dennab
    June 2011
    2,108 Posts
    That little bitch was planning on bringing the plane down, thank god they caught her.
    god bless america.
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  3. Post #3
    World's Okayest Comic Guy
    usaokay's Avatar
    February 2005
    17,672 Posts
    USA is a-okay!
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  4. Post #4
    Gold Member
    Gubbinz96's Avatar
    September 2006
    3,445 Posts
    Up to this point in her life, Riyanna had only ever dropped bombs in her diaper, but that wasn’t fooling the TSA
    Weapons of Mass-Distraction

    of course
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  5. Post #5
    bull3tmagn3t's Avatar
    August 2008
    1,455 Posts
    thank god i don't live in the U.S.
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  6. Post #6
    Gold Member
    Blooper Reel's Avatar
    February 2011
    5,459 Posts
    TSA has really been upping the ante with their stupidity lately.
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  7. Post #7
    ThermalArc's Avatar
    July 2011
    1,302 Posts
    TSA and their shit is russling my jimmies

    (User was banned for this post ("Meme reply" - Craptasket))
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  8. Post #8
    Fabulous!
    Jack Trades's Avatar
    April 2010
    6,483 Posts
    Thank GOD they stopped her! She would've definitely cause second 9/11. Just look at her, she dreams about bringing down American freedom and establish communistic socialistic nazi regime! I can see it in her eyes!
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  9. Post #9
    Gold Member
    Vaught's Avatar
    June 2008
    6,315 Posts
    Terrorist babies, the worst of them all.
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  10. Post #10
    ThisGuy0's Avatar
    July 2009
    2,119 Posts
    Guys I know the TSA is shit but if someone's flagged as no fly I'm pretty sure the officers don't have disgression to choose whether they fly. I remember a story exactly like this over here in the Daily Mail years ago and it was as much a daft non-story as this.
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  11. Post #11
    What's brevity?
    ironman17's Avatar
    June 2006
    19,544 Posts
    All this paranoid fear about terror just creates so much annoyance and stupidity, doesn't it? Gods, I hate to imagine how much paranoid madness would spring up if we end up plunged into another world war; that is if we don't all end up as Hiroshima-fried Long Pig within the first few hours because some piece of cartilage decided to florp on the Fire Ze Missiles button.
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  12. Post #12
    Gold Member
    Scotchair's Avatar
    May 2007
    3,352 Posts
    if she was flagged as no fly how did she make it as far as the plane before they noticed?
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  13. Post #13
    Gold Member
    cecilbdemodded's Avatar
    January 2005
    6,526 Posts
    How is babby banned?
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  14. Post #14
    Gold Member
    SpaceGhost's Avatar
    December 2010
    4,860 Posts
    God this makes me feel embarrassed about the US, makes all the rational smart people look like the rest of the retards.
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  15. Post #15
    Gold Member
    Kendra's Avatar
    November 2008
    7,209 Posts
    What the media doesn't report is how the baby was carrying a 17 kiloton nuclear charge in its diaper.
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  16. Post #16
    DO YOU SLAP THE IMOUTO?YES/NO
    Eonart's Avatar
    August 2010
    5,178 Posts
    america land of the free
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  17. Post #17
    Gold Member
    krakadict's Avatar
    June 2009
    2,917 Posts
    counter-terrorists win
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  18. Post #18
    Blue Member?
    Ermac20's Avatar
    October 2010
    7,629 Posts
    tsa aren't in canada are they?
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  19. Post #19
    Fuck you TSA. You suck at everything.
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  20. Post #20
    2014 SH Pun Award Nominee
    Awesomecaek's Avatar
    January 2009
    21,268 Posts
    counter-terrorists win
    Actually, terrorist win.

    Counter-terrorists shot all the hostages.
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  21. Post #21
    Gold Member
    Dennab
    March 2009
    2,583 Posts
    Fuck you TSA. You suck at everything.
    They don't suck at sucking.
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  22. Post #22
    Gold Member
    RR_Raptor65's Avatar
    February 2006
    3,300 Posts
    This happened to a friend when he tried to fly with his daughter. Took a phone call to determine that a 6 year old girl was not a terrorist.
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  23. Post #23
    Gold Member
    Glorbo's Avatar
    May 2010
    5,371 Posts
    American bureaucracy is fucking retarded. What is up with the people that work for US government agencies? It's like they have no sense of personal judgement whatsoever.
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  24. Post #24
    *cough*
    Willox's Avatar
    December 2009
    1,363 Posts
    This article is horribly sarcastic.
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  25. Post #25
    The Union Jack would look a shit ton better with a Hammer and Sickle in the middle of it
    Bobie's Avatar
    November 2007
    7,267 Posts
    I ALWAYS KNEW AL QAEDA RECRUITED THEM YOUNG, BUT NOT LIKE THIS

    FUCKING SICK CUNTS
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  26. Post #26
    NEAT GUY
    TheFilmSlacker's Avatar
    January 2011
    18,945 Posts
    Without reading the article, it sounds like something from The Onion.

    The TSA seems to make the headlines a lot lately. Hopefully something gets done about their bullshit.
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  27. Post #27
    Gold Member
    Ericson666's Avatar
    May 2011
    3,452 Posts
    To be brutally fair, after Vietnam people aren't just going to go "ohhhhh, cute wittwe baby... Go right on ahead" anymore.
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  28. Post #28
    Djentleman's Avatar
    October 2011
    294 Posts
    For some reason due to the way the thread was titled I pictured TSA Agents, in mid-flight, going "I'm sorry ma'am, but your daughter must be removed from the airplane" then they jump out of the emergency exit with parachutes and the baby.

  29. Post #29
    RAPISTS ARE OPPRESSED
    mobrockers2's Avatar
    April 2011
    12,403 Posts
    To be brutally fair, after Vietnam people aren't just going to go "ohhhhh, cute wittwe baby... Go right on ahead" anymore.
    Vietnam?

  30. Post #30
    Ever hear about the kids running into officer tents with grenades?
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  31. Post #31
    RAPISTS ARE OPPRESSED
    mobrockers2's Avatar
    April 2011
    12,403 Posts
    Ever hear about the kids running into officer tents with grenades?
    Yes, never heard of americans distrusting babies since Vietnam..

  32. Post #32
    Yes, never heard of americans distrusting babies since Vietnam..
    Yeah, well I was clarifying his...comparison.

  33. Post #33
    Gold Member
    Sunday_Roast's Avatar
    November 2007
    3,429 Posts
    Terrorists win.

    No, really!!!


    It's just this kind of paranoid stupidity is what they want to influence.
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  34. Post #34
    OMG SHE JUST KID

    Did everyone forget a few days ago they found gun parts in a childs toy. I know is is stupid but the whole FUCK THE US stuff is annoying as hell.
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  35. Post #35
    Gold Member
    RichyZ's Avatar
    September 2007
    16,457 Posts
    OMG SHE JUST KID

    Did everyone forget a few days ago they found gun parts in a childs toy. I know is is stupid but the whole FUCK THE US stuff is annoying as hell.
    because a kid is going to have the skills necessary to disassemble a gun, plant it in their toys, then reassemble when the time is right

    yeah
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  36. Post #36
    Not that bad of a seed
    asteroidrules's Avatar
    January 2011
    11,134 Posts
    As ridiculous as this may seem, there's nothing else that could've been done, they can't help it if a couple decides to name their child after a suspected terrorist (knowingly or otherwise). If the name's on a no-fly list then they're under direct orders to not allow anyone with that name onto a plane, this would happen in any country, with any security agency.
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  37. Post #37
    Lyonidis's Avatar
    November 2010
    1,436 Posts
    TSA needs to straight up just fuck off.
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  38. Post #38
    Gold Member
    Splash Attack's Avatar
    January 2012
    1,479 Posts
    Meh, I wouldn't blame the TSA agent personally. They aren't allowed to let someone on the no-fly list pass under any circumstances. There should just be a better way of screening people once their name is brought up to make sure they're not a threat.

  39. Post #39
    because a kid is going to have the skills necessary to disassemble a gun, plant it in their toys, then reassemble when the time is right

    yeah
    yeah xD



    because they fly alone right?
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  40. Post #40
    Ogopogo's Avatar
    March 2011
    4,989 Posts
    The no fly list needs a reworking, mainly for cases where multiple people have the same name. I remember a story about a teenager from Canada was going to the US. The only problem was, he had the same name as someone on the no fly list (it was his first time on a plane, or travelling to the US), and then his family had to cancel their trip because of it