This thread is an attempt to reduce the heaping amount of support requests that equate to nothing more than the gum on the bottom of my shoe. Despite popular belief, a few people actually take serious interest in helping you resolve your problems. Unfortunately, that interest quickly turns into hatred; the thought of pushing you off a bridge is far more satisfying than trying to decipher your shit-posts.
You should expect frequent updates over the next few days. If you have any specific requests, or would like to share resources and tutorials, please PM me. For any tech-savy folks who'd like to contribute to the overall health of this forum, I encourage you to write and format your own section to be included; I will happily add it. If you notice any spelling or grammatical errors, do tell.
Organization will change regularly.
TuneUp Utilities 2010
Dell Tech Support: 800-624-9896
Acer Computer: 800-816-2237
Microsoft Tech Support: 800-642-7676
Gateway Computers: 800-846-2000
HP Computers: 800-474-6836
ATI Technologies: 877-284-1566
Seagate Technology: 800-732-4283
Western Digital: 949-672-7000
Sony / Playstation: 800-222-7669
Checking Start-up Entries – Increase start-up speed, disable nonessential entries, troubleshoot security issues.
Start > Run > msconfig > Startup Tab
Entering the Registry – Find CD keys, fix DLL errors, remove malicious entries, edit settings for performance.
Start > Run > regedit
Running DirectX Diagnostics – Troubleshoot audio and video, good source of system information.
Start > Run > dxdiag
Device Troubleshooting – Scan for hardware changes, look for disabled or unknown devices.
Start > Right click My Computer > Manage > Device Manager
Configure Services – Disable nonessential services, troubleshoot malicious entries.
Start > Run > services.msc
Using Custom DNS – Potentially increase browsing speed, prevents redirects and hijacking.
Google Public DNS
Copy Command Prompt Information – Request help, get details.
Right Click > Mark > Highlight desired area > Ctrl+C
Error Checking, Defrag Verify system files, defragment for performance.
My Computer > Right click desired drive > Properties > Tools Tab > Check Now of Defragment Now
IP Configuration – Troubleshooting your connection, clearing DNS, renewing your IP.
Start > Run > CMD > ipconfig /
[LIST][*]/? Display this help message[*]/all Display full configuration information.[*]/release Release the IPv4 address for the specified adapter.[*]/release6 Release the IPv6 address for the specified adapter.[*]/renew Renew the IPv4 address for the specified adapter.[*]/renew6 Renew the IPv6 address for the specified adapter.[*]/flushdns Purges the DNS Resolver cache.[*]/registerdns Refreshes all DHCP leases and re-registers DNS names.[*]/displaydns Display the contents of the DNS Resolver Cache.[*]/showclassid Displays all the dhcp class IDs allowed for adapter.[*]/setclassid Modifies the dhcp class id.[*]/showclassid6 Displays all the IPv6 DHCP class IDs allowed for adapter.[*]/setclassid6 Modifies the IPv6 DHCP class id.[/LIST]
Let us examine some popular post types.
My X isn't functioning properly? What's wrong with it?
It knows that you're in control. In protest to your remarkable stupidity, it has ceased to function.
I've got this friend who is having trouble. He can't do X on Y. What now?
Fuck you and your friend. We are not messengers, nor are we interested in playing the middleman. If you serve as a mere conveyor of information, we're not interested in helping you. Be present, have access.
Is X product worth the money? Is it cool?
I'd rather you spend that money a self-help book in hopes of curing your mind-numbing ignorance. This is not a product review section.
I've been having a problem with HillaryDuff.exe; what's the deal?
I bet you didn't Google it, therefore you are wasting my time.
My computer shows <amount less than 4GB> of memory, but I have 4GB of memory!
[LIST][*]Have you heard of Google? [*]Have you searched the official product and/or game forums?[*]Have you tried switching ports?[*]Did you update all related drivers? [*]Is your operating system up-to-date? [*]Do you have direct access to the machine and/or software/peripheral?[/LIST]Items listed above are simple and straightforward, yet this basic information is often left out when requesting help. Outside searches are by far the best means of finding a solution. Many of the answers given here are a direct result of someone using Google; there is absolutely no excuse for your lack of search engine skills.
If your best efforts and steady will to find a solution on your own have proved to be futile endeavors, you're ready to ask for help. The more information you provide (even for the simplest problem) will do wonders. Check it out:
Don't ask if you have a virus. If you're the type of person who regularly browses sites that have even the slightest possibility of housing malicious code, you know the answer to that question.
You should be using FireFox or Chrome when browsing the net.
Both browsers offer numerous plug-ins for safe browsing: Chrome Extensions, FireFox Plug-ins
We're well beyond the point of recommending things like NoScript and AdBlock, so I'm not going to waste my time explaining the necessity. You'd also be a fool to assume that these plug-ins will solve your vulnerability issues; your browsing/computer usage habits are the main cause of infection. The following section provides resources to assist you in cleaning up and staying safe. In all honesty, none of these are necessary. Again, because I enjoy being a redudant bastard: your browsing/computer usage habits are the main cause of infection.
[LIST][*]Are you downloading music?[*]Are you downloading torrents? [*]Are you still using MySpace like the bitch that you are?[*]Do you frequent YouJizz.com without safeguards? [*]Do you fail to scan your computer on a regular basis?[*]Do you click links from random people on Facebook?[/LIST]
Knowing what's safe and what isn't is a learning process, but if you don't have downs syndrome and aren't a mouth-breathing bottom feeder, it's pretty obvious. Just to be clear, there's nothing wrong with torrents and YouJizz, but make sure you're taking the steps to ensure your computers well being.
Help! I think I'm infected with AmyWinehouse.trojan.3
No, fuck you. Help yourself:
[LIST][*]Do you have active spyware protection? SpyBot, Malwarebytes, HijackThis[*]Are you running an anti-virus program? NOD32, AVG, Kapersky, Avast, Avira[*]Are you reguarly clearing your cache, cookies, and registry errors? CCleaner[*]Have you checked your start-up entries and active processes? Do they look abnormal? Process Library[*]Have you run Windows Defender? [/LIST]
I don't know how to check my start-up entries or processes. What now?
If for some reason you believe your machine is past the point of no return, I'd recommend formating and starting fresh. If the idea of wiping your drives frightens you, I can help.
If (by the grace of Zeus) my computer was struck by a lightning bolt from the heavens, I would be okay with that. Data loss happens and it happens frequently. Most of the time it's unintentional, but what about the need to start over? Reformatting and starting from scratch is fantastic! I'd recommend it if you're feeling extra sluggish due to the epic proportions of useless content you've got bundled up.
I am 100% virtual. Anything of importance that currently resides on my computer also resides on the cloud. Software, drivers, games, settings, bookmarks, etc. For added security, I've also got everything on a small, external HD. I am mobile command station; everything I need is always at my fingertips.
External backup aside, let's look at some online solutions. Third-party applications are often the easiest and cheapest solutions, but investing in your own web space is the best way to secure your assets:
[list][*]DropBox[*]Box.net[*]Carbonite[*]Web hosting: Dreamhost, HostGator, Site5[/LIST]As mentioned, let's assume that reformatting your computer is the safest (and most logical) solution to clear any and all security threats.
[LIST][*]My external HD contains the most recent driver for every piece of hardware in my machine. [*]My web hosting and virtual storage clients also contain these drivers, as well everything else of importance (fonts, PSD files, small application installations, a text file with account information and product keys). [*]Format and reinstall the OS of your choice. Install your essential applications (XChat, Skype, FireFox, Pandora). [*]Before diving back in to regular usage habits, create an image of the installation and throw it on a CD.[/LIST]
If Rosie O'Donnell magically appeared with the sole intention of devouring both your little sister and your beloved computer, you can rest easy in knowing that you really haven't lost anything.
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